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120+ Winter Jokes & Riddles for Kids and Families (Free Printable List)
Warm the hearts of kids and adults alike with this list of over 100 hilarious cold-weather jokes.
Jokes About Winter
What’s the currency of the North Pole?
- Cold, hard cash!
What do superheroes add to their drinks during winter?
- Just-ice.
What do you call a group of Arctic hares hopping backward?
- A receding hare line.
How does Jack Frost get to work?
- By icicle.
What is the name of Jack Frost’s favorite aunt?
- Aunt Arctica
What does Jack Frost call his parents?
- Mom and Pop-sicle
What does December have that no other month has?
- The letter D.
What did the tree say to the first snowflake of winter?
- Long time, snow see.
What did the wool hat say to the scarf?
- You hang around while I go on ahead.
What do you call a photo taken at the North Pole?
- A polar-oid.
When does winter begin?
- When autumn leaves.
What fish do you catch in the winter?
- Frozen fish sticks.
What did the icy road say to the truck?
- Want to go for a spin?
Why do birds fly south for the winter?
- It’s too far to walk.
What bites but doesn’t have teeth?
- Frost.
What happens when you catch a cold in the winter?
- You get cabin fever.
What does a Starbucks employee’s job title change to in winter?
- A brrrr-ista!
What’s the most popular breakfast in winter?
- Frosted Flakes!
How did the snow globe feel after the winter storm?
- A little shaken.
What falls in winter but never gets hurt?
- Snow.
What did one snowflake say to the other snowflake?
- You’re one of a kind.
Did you hear about the man stuck in a snowstorm?
- He was feeling under the weather.
What do you call an igloo with no bathroom?
- An Ig.
Why do Arctic foxes have winter coats?
- Because they’d look so silly in sweaters.
What did the Swiss skier shout when he fell down a mountain?
- Alp!
What’s the difference between ice and icicle?
- Ice has noel.
What happens when a moose feels cold?
- They get moose bumps!
What do you put over a baby reindeer’s crib?
- A snow-mobile.
Why do bears always get fired in the winter?
- They get caught sleeping on the job.
What did the Arctic explorers say in the snow storm?
- This weather is snow joke.
What did the snowflake say when its friend was upset?
- Don’t flurry, be happy.
What is a winter ghost called?
- Casp-brrrrrrr.
What’s a reindeer’s favorite coffee shop?
- Starbucks.
What do trees say after a very long winter?
- That’s a re-leaf.
What do you call a slow skier?
- A slopepoke!
How do you build a snow house?
- Igloo it together.
What kind of robots live at the North Pole?
- Snow-bots.
Did you hear about the kid who was hit with a snowball?
- He was knocked out cold.
How does a mountain stay warm?
- Snowcaps.
What kind of ball never bounces?
- A snowball.
Snowman Jokes
Why do snowmen keep their vinyl collection outside in the winter?
- They only like cool music.
What rapper do snowmen love?
- Ice-T.
What was the snowman doing at the grocery store?
- Picking out a nose.
What do you call a snowman’s pet poodle?
- A slush-puppy.
What is a female snowman called?
- A snow-ma’am
Why isn’t Frosty ever late?
- Time waits for snow-man.
What do you call an old snowman?
- Water.
What do you sing on a snowman’s birthday?
- Freeze a jolly good fellow.
What did the snowman say as it left its friend’s house?
- I’ll snow myself out.
What do you call little snowmen?
- Chill-dren.
What do you call it when a snowman has a tantrum?
- A meltdown.
What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
- Ice Krispies.
What gift should you never give a snowman?
- An electric blanket.
How do you protect yourself from angry snowmen?
- With a heater.
What issue are snowmen most concerned about?
- Global warming.
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a shark?
- Frost bite.
How does a snowman travel?
- By riding an icicle.
What did one snowman say to the other when they were late for a party?
- Let’s go, I’m in a flurry!
What’s a snowman’s dream job?
- To be in snow-business.
Why do snowmen turn yellow sometimes?
- Ask your dog.
What did one snowman say to the other?
- I smell carrots
Where do snowmen save their money?
- Snowbanks.
What did the eye doctor say to the snowman?
- How’s your icesight?
Who protects snowmen?
- Snow angels.
Where did the snowmen go dancing?
- The Snowball.
What do you call a snowman on roller skates?
- A snowmobile.
What did the police officer say to the snowman robbing a bank?
- Freeze!
What kind of haircuts do snowmen get?
- Cold cuts.
What does Frosty’s mom put on her face at night?
- Cold cream.
What do you call a snowman in summer?
- A puddle.
Did you hear about the very rude snowman?
- He didn’t even carrot all.
Why can’t you ever trust a snowman?
- They’re flakes.
What do snowmen get when they turn 16?
- A license to chill.
What do you call a snowman on a hot day?
- Water.
How do you make a snowman’s bed?
- With sheets of ice and a blanket of snow.
What’s a snowman’s favorite drink?
- A slushy
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Polar Bear Jokes
Why are polar bears so itchy?
- They have antarc-ticks.
What do you get when a polar bear ignores you?
- The cold shoulder.
What do polar bears call seals riding a skateboard?
- Meals on Wheels.
What is a polar bear’s favorite food?
- Brrrrrrritos.
How do polar bears greet each other?
- Ice to meet you.
What do you call a group of polar bears in the desert?
- Lost.
Why did the polar bear fall asleep in the snow?
- It needed a powder nap.
Who is a polar bear’s favorite singer?
- Seal.
What do you call a polar bear with no ears?
- Anything you like, they can’t hear you.
What’s a polar bears favorite event at school?
- Snow-and-Tell
Penguin Jokes
What’s a penguin’s favorite drink?
- Iced tea.
What did the penguin get when it won the bobsled race?
- A cold medal.
Why do penguins like to swim in saltwater?
- Because pepper makes them sneeze.
Why did the penguin only wear one mitten?
- The weather forecast had a 50% chance of snow.
What do penguins love to do on the weekend?
- Chill out.
What did the penguin say to the polar bear?
- Have an ice day!
What’s a penguin’s favorite kind of cake?
- Anything covered in icing.
What do you call a penguin that’s really smart?
- Brrrr-iliant.
What’s a penguin’s favorite condiment?
- Chilly sauce.
What do penguins wear when they get cold?
- Ice caps
Why didn’t the penguin go to the party?
- It had snow one to go with.
Why did the penguin crash on the road?
- There aren’t any chickens in the Arctic.
What kind of fish do penguins catch at night?
- Starfish
What did the penguin say when it got lost in the igloo?
- There’s snow way out.
Yeti & Snow Monster Jokes
Where does a Yeti surf the web?
- On the Winter-net.
What do healthy yetis eat?
- Iceberg lettuce.
How do you get a snow monster to go away?
- Get into a heated argument.
What do you call a very strong winter monster with a six-pack?
- Abdominal snowman.
What’s a yeti’s favorite lunch?
- An iceberger.
Why didn’t the abominable snowman go to the party?
- He had snow-one to go with.
Why are yetis always invited to parties?
- They’re great at breaking the ice.
What do snow monsters eat for breakfast?
- Frost Bites
What’s a snow monster’s favorite food?
- Ice scream
What prize did the yeti win for its ice sculpture?
- Best in Snow.
What did the yeti say to the snow monster after it explained its idea?
- Icy what you mean.
Winter Knock Knock Jokes
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Ben!
Ben who?
Ben waiting for winter all year!
Knock, knock.
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Freeze.
Freeze who?
Freeze a jolly good fellow, freeze a jolly good fellow…
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Holly.
Holly who?
Holly up, it’s cold out here.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Emma.
Emma who?
Emma cold standing outside.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Snow.
Snow who?
Snow use, I can’t remember.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Snow.
Snow who?
Snowbody home.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Icy.
Icy who?
Icy you!
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Snow.
Snow who?
Snow real way of knowing.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Scold.
Scold who?
‘Scold outside!
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Ivan.
Ivan who?
Ivan awful cold right now.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Icy.
Icy who?
Icy a big snowstorm coming!
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Snow.
Snow who?
Snow way I’m telling you.
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Lettuce.
Lettuce who?
Lettuce in, it’s cold out!
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